I heard Rob Bell use this phrase on a podcast recently and I’ve been thinking about it ever since. He was talking about an opportunity he got a few years ago to launch a TV show. Even though he thought he’d been holding that idea loosely, he admitted he was crushed when it didn’t work out. Sound familiar? It did to me.
That made me think about how tightly I hold some things, like ideas about how my life should be, what my career looks like, lots of things. I always thought that was the way you were supposed to do it. Get an idea about what you want, make a plan and execute the hell out of it. No holds barred. And, incidentally, hold on to that idea until someone pries it out of your cold dead hand or something similarly dramatic. I thought that was called goal setting. Being results oriented. Whatever.
But I’m starting to understand that by holding on to some ideas so tightly, I may be missing out on some other good stuff along the way. Visually, holding on loosely also allows light to show through your fingers. It also makes me feel like what I’m holding might slip through my fingers but I guess that’s the point. The tighter you hold it, the more power you give it. Conversely, the more loosely you hold something you want, the easier it is to see other options and change course. Of course, holding something loosely also allow for you to be surprised by the outcome. (See picture above: During the Bay to Breakers race, I asked a guy dressed as Elvis to take a picture with me. He called for back-up Elvises and the rest is history. So much better!)
It’s not the way I’m programmed but I’m starting to get the idea that Plan A or bust is a tough row to hoe. And maybe I’m making this harder than it needs to be. I have a friend who always says a prayer for “this or something better.” I never thought that applied to be because I’ve already envisioned the best possible outcome.
For today at least, I’m going to loosen up my hold on a few things. Let life flow a bit. This or something better. Today, I choose to believe.
Boonedoggler 